Really Fresh News

Now that the editor is over his writers block or the trauma from having his golf game completely disappear, we can get you some news.

Last Sunday we had 21 Pot Gamers large and small tee it up for a little 2 BB with all birdies counting.  Team #1 Joey M, BB and Rama led the way with a respectable +4 on the front.  Team #2 Skrocki, Fireman and Blue Tees weren't so lucky and limped in with a +6 for the opening nine.  Team #3 Bear, Chimney and Donny R coasted to a even par score without breaking a sweat.  Team # 4 Pudge, Molasses Boy and CFC tied for the lead with even as well.  Team #5 DMac, Little BB and Dr Dave started out hot but stumbled to a +2.  Team #6 Sandy, Tractorman and Johnny Hilow blew up with a +6 which sealed their fate for the overall.  Team #7 Mad Dog, Billy D and Adrian (yes that Adrian) cruised to a even par score which made them tied for the front.

On the back Team #1 had a birdie blitz and blew away the field with -2 good enough for a third of the pot.  Team # 3 shot another even par to take the over all.

There were 5 skins worth $20 a piece (Blue Tees 2, Bear 1, Pudge 1 and Donny Roy 1).  Low scores of the day were Pudge 71, Mad Dog 72, Bear 73, DMac 73,  and BB 74.

The auto dog matches were as follows:
Mad Dog plucking $1 from Bear making the YTD Mad Dog up $76.  (yes that is the correct number)

Pudge despite shooting 71 could not get into Bear's pocket so YTD Pudge up $54.

Sandy struggled so Bear was able to collect $11 making the YTD Bear up $21.

Below is the latest accounting of the Hole-In-One Pool.  If you want to pay for previous pools you can, so you will be eligible for the big prize worth $1,310.

Summer Highlights

A lot of rounds have been played in the last two months since the last blog post.  Here are some of the highlights to get you up to speed.

Cheez finally joined Bretwood as a member after Mrs Cheez released him from servitude after he completed her "honey do list" of items to prepare his house for sale.  But missed several Pot Games because he was too exhausted get up in the morning.

Mad Dog in semi retirement (not sure you can call it retirement when you work less than 20 hrs a week) finds lots of time to practice while he isn't watering his plants.  His finely tuned "flick at the bottom" swing produced scores that Bear could not match.  So their dollar a hole match has become rather one sided to the point that Mad Dog was able to invest in several shares of blue chip stocks. Bear's only hope is for Mad Dog's annual late swoon when he pulls out his playbook of ailments to excuse his bad play.

Billy D has become so consistent with his scoring (82 every round) using his cut swing that Pot Gamers don't refer to par anymore they talk about their score over/under Billy's Ds.  He and Green Mountain Gretchen are still an item although he has yet to bring her out to the deck.

Tractorman has been up to his old tricks of setting pins on the north course in diabolical places that repel every putt attempt.  Some things never change as he still hates to play the south course.

We have a new addition to the Pot Game.  Jack Nadeau otherwise known as "Little BB".   He has a great swing refined under the watchful eye of Pudge.  While BB has been struggling to break 80 Little BB has been playing him for new ProVs.  Let's just say Little BB won't have to buy any balls this fall when he tries out for the coach Joey M's High School Golf team.

Donny Roy made a hole-in-one a few weeks ago which lead to rumors on the deck whether or not he was in the pool.  It turns out he never paid for any of the 4 pools still open, so over $1300 is still available to some lucky paid up Pot Gamer.

House cries every week that he wants to go to the white tees now that he turned 70.  His pleas fall on deaf ears the minute he yank hooks his tee ball 275 yards off the first tee.  Playing the whites won't help his wedges and "prayer" stroke only practice will.

Jay Esch came back from Florida with a handicap so inflated that even Otis wouldn't have dared to use it.  Mad Dog immediately found a way for him to always end up on his team as a D man.  His handicap has since plummeted but not before filling his pockets with wads of Pot money.

When Deacon is not doing face plants out of his bed or dispatching poor Barbara to DD's for his coffee at 4:30am, he is quietly making plans to hold his annual Invitational with the help of Joey M.  But between Deacon's purged Pot Gamers list and Joey M's narrow pool of people he can stand, it will be tough to fill a full field.

Birdie doesn't seem himself lately.  He has been wearing collared shirts and has been showing up at the first tee 3 minutes early instead of 5 minutes late.  He was one of the first Pot Gamers to get to play with Little BB and wasted no time in initiating him into the Pot Game way when he filled the air with dozens of f-bombs when his stinger driver went awry.

Fireman has limited playing time now that he is #2 at KFD.  He has been sharping up his short game by schooling Bear on the chipping green before each round.  His drives are straightening out and his scores are headed in the downward direction.  While on call if there is a second alarm he is mandated to head to the station, but surprisingly since the spring and warm weather there hasn't been a second alarm fire on a Wednesday, Saturday or Sunday.

Pudge got a taste of what it means to work in Corporate America, when his former employer which rhymes with Pricks, decided the initials next to his name PGA made him expendable.  The most disappointed person was Billy D because he didn't get to return his newest driver for credit.  Ginger has decided to help out her boyfriend by recruiting duffers for lessons.  Pudge lesson $100 for half hour, Pudge lesson with Ginger autographed bikini poster $200.

To say that Chimney can curve a golf ball would be understatement.  To fit his drives on to some fairways he has to start his ball well over the river which is why his golf balls have begun asking for life jackets before they are launched.  His rama and jama style putting is still going strong as the dents in the back of the cups can attest.

Chris From The Crotch has been a popular addition to the Pot Game with his dry sense of humor and robot like straight drives.  He was recruited by Jerry Maguire.  He also shares the same heritage as Rama Yama, although he hasn't let loose with "Macaroni & Cheese" when he hits a bad shot like Rama does.

Dr Dave's fairway woods are second to none towering with lots of carry, but his putting is holding him back from the winning ways of last summer.  Looks like the Pot Game law of averages has taken its toll on another victim.

Ran Out Of Gas

Last Monday was the 2014 Battle of the Beav which annually pits the Commish against Birdie for bragging rights and a brand new "Beav" hat for the winner.  For the third year in a row Birdie prevailed.  The Commish out of practice and a committed farmer jumped out to an early lead of three strokes but he ran out of gas on the back under the par barrage by Birdie with a couple 2s thrown in for good measure.

Official Score Card

Billy D got caught up watching the match and forgot to make a few birdies himself as he sliced his way to a 87 instead of his usual 82.  Rumor has it Commish is taking up horseshoes instead of golf.  All pics compliments of Pudge Productions.

Commish Congratulates Birdie

Winner's Choice Of Hat

The Long Wait Is Over

After weeks of no news reports from the Pot Game Gazette, we are happy to report the staff is back and hard at work.  In an effort to keep you abreast of all that has gone on for the last month we sent our best reporter to dig out the score cards from the archive from week two to present day to bring you all up to date.

Moldy Old News 

Sat. 4/19/14 Cold and miserable conditions still produced 16 players who were just happy to be able to play after a long winter. 

Team #1 Pudge, Andy Mac, Molasses Boy and Blue Tees struggled out of the box with a +13 (3 BB) on the front. Team # 2  Bear, Brad-Brian, Tractorman and House looked great on paper but not on the course when they shot +10.  Team # 3 DMac, TJ, Dicky Mac and Rama cruised on the front until ran into a slight pump on holes 8 & 9 but still managed to tie the front for half a side. Team #4 Skrocki, Otis, Billy D and Fireman played steady on the front with a +7  to grab half a side. 

The back nine brought a strong wind and colder temps and the scores reflected it.  Team # 1 won with a tidy +9.  The other teams #2 +29 (new record), #3 +18 and #4 +12.  Which made Team # 4 the overall winner.

Low scores were DMac 72, Otis 79.

Pudge plucked $8 from Bear making YTD Pudge +$8.

Sun. 4/20/14 On another blustery cold day 14 players showed.

Team #1 Pudge, BB, Andy Mac and Chimney despite playing one player short shot +2 (2 BB) which was good enough by a wide margin.  Team #2 Bear, TJ, Jerry Mag, Rama and Loy never got untracked  and came in with a whopping +15.  Team #3 Mad Dog, Skrocki, Billy D, Fireman and House shot a very average +8.  On the back Team #3 cruised to a smooth +4 which also gave them the overall with +12.

Low scores were Mad Dog 75, Pudge 76, TJ 77 and Andy Mac 77.  There were 3 skins (House, Mad Dog and Bear) worth $23 a piece.

Pudge nicked Bear for $7 making YTD Pudge +$15
Mad Dog reached into Bear's pocket for $6 making YTD Mad Dog +6

Sun 4/27/14  Cool gray day still attracted 16 players.

Team #1 Bear, Dicky Mac, Jerry M and Blue Tees never got untracked and shot +15 (3 BB) on the front.  Team #2 Sandy, Andy Mac, Rama and House were done after second hole and ended up with +15.  Team #3 Skrocki, Molasses Boy, Fireman and Chris Martz (new member and Rama look alike) thought they were out of it with +12 but just missed.  Team # 4 Otis, TJ, Chimney and Scottie-Steve (back from the missing) eked out a 1 shot victory with a +11.  Team #1 when the fog cleared won the back with a +10.  Which put Team # 4 in the winners circle for overall with +23 and two sides.

Low scores Otis 80, Andy Mac 80, TJ 81 and Skrocki 81  There were three skins (Dicky Mac 2, Chimney 1) worth $26 a piece.

Sandy won $1 from Bear making YTD Sandy +$1.

Stale News

Sat 5/3/14  Improving weather brought out 25 Pot Gamers to play on the North course.

Mad Dog in a panic with 25 players decided to play fivesomes which goes against all his principles.
Team #1 NNN, Tractorman, Joey M, Rama and Chimney shot a respectable +3 (3 BB).  Team #2 Pudge, TJ, Birdie, Jerry M and Donny Roy melted down to a +9.  Team #3 were a middle of the pack +5.  Team #4 Bear, Skrocki, Brett, Fireman and Blue Tees shot a quiet +2 for half of the front side.  Team #5 DMac, Andy Mac, 40, Billy D and Skooger somehow got to +2 with no one breaking 40 on the front.  Team #1 ripped the back for -5 with 7 birdies and cruised to an easy overall victory as well.

Low scores NNN 71, Tractorman 73, Bear 74 and DMac 75.  There were 7 skins (Billy D 2, Bear 1, NNN 1, Fireman 1, DMac 1, Joey M 1) worth $17 a piece.

Bear clipped Pudge for $6 making YTD Pudge up +$9
Bear nipped Mad Dog for $4 making YTD MD up +$2
Bear took $1 from Sandy making YTD all even.

Sat 5/10/14  18 Players decided to risk putting on the slower than brillo pads greens and came out to do battle.

Team # 1 NNN, Birdie and Jerry M thought they were safe with a +1 (2 BB) but alias they were wrong.  Team #2 Bear, Molasses Boy, Fireman never got untracked and shot +4 .  Team #3 Mixologist, Brett and Billy D hooked, sliced and chunked their way to a whooping +8.  Team #4 Mad Dog, Dicky Mac and Chimney shot a smooth stress free +1.  Team #5 Sandy, Andy Mac and Blue Tees nipped the field with a front nine even par.  Team # 6 Skrocki, TJ and Chris tired from waiting to tee off shot a pedestrian +3.  Team #3 used 5 birdies to get to +1 on the back but Team # 6 only needed 1 birdie to get the same result +1.  But Team #6 took the overall with +4.

Low scores were Bear 74, Skrocki 75, Andy Mac 75, Sandy 76 and NNN 76.  There were 4 skins (NNN 1, Andy Mac 1, Skrocki 1 and TJ 1) worth $22 a piece.

Bear took a chunk of change $9 from Mad Dog making YTD Bear +$7
Bear nipped Sandy for $3 making YTD Bear +$3

Come and Gone

Opening Day finally arrived last Saturday with 14 Pot Gamers making an appearance.  Details are sketchy with all Gazette reporters attending The Masters.  Billy D did not shoot his normal 82 (but 84) but did convert his 3 birdies into skins for a cool $33 in his pocket.

Sunday brought another 14 players to the first tee however a few rain drops produced the first crisis for the new old Commissioner.  There was a drop out after the teams were picked which caused teams to be unbalanced.  The offending player earned himself a double X from the Commish, which puts him on the edge of expulsion and a parking lot chat.  Brad-Brian fresh from thousands of swings in his new range shot out of the blocks with a 74, with 5 birdies.  He propelled his team to a sweep of all 3 sides and earned himself 3 skins.

Cheez left The Villages today and will wind his way northward with two stops in NC to visit kids and grandchildren.  He will arrive early next week.  However he will not be at any Pot Games until he preps his house for the market.  Plus he will be paying green fees so the pain of opening his wallet and handing over cash will be a deterrent as well.

Bear made his annual trek to Augusta to take in The Masters.  This year for the first time in 9 years Mrs Bear made the trip as well.  After spending all day Thursday walking the manicured hills of Augusta National, they met their boys for dinner and the exchange of the Patron Badges.  Then they headed down to Hilton Head.  With the Harbour Town course closed for play for this weeks tournament they were able to walk on the course.  The 18th green is tiny when you see it up close.  Their suitcases were full coming home with all the Pot Gamer requested Master's Pro Shop purchases.

Warmer weather should improve the number of Pot Gamers making their debut.

Drip Drip Drip

14th Hole as of Monday April 7th

With the snow on the course in neat little melting rows clear of the fairways and greens, The Big House has decided the time to start collecting some cash is now.  Mad Dog announced to The Gazette and it was confirmed by Tractorman, the course will open this Saturday the 12th.  There will 27 holes open to start.  So if the new old Commish gets his act together and arranges a tee time, the first Pot Game of 2014 will be on Saturday.  Chances are very strong however he will be a no show so whatever Pot Gamers do show up they will be on their own to create a format.

The endless winter has dragged on so long, Pot Gamers have been traveling out of state to play.  Last week Pudge and Otis headed to MA and TJ headed to CT.

You can tell its Spring time when:

Jay Esch playing 16th at Cypress Point

Jay Esch sends in pictures of his FL yard full of flowers or the places he has played golf this past winter.
Commish has to rescue the donkeys from ankle deep mud in their paddock.
Cheez endures the wrath from the "Sticks" for heading home to NH with the other "Snow Birds".
Tractorman gets ready to cut the diabolical pin placements that he has been dreaming up all winter.
Deacon polishes up his deck stories by telling them to other patients in the hospital when he gets his treatment.
Mad Dog uses his winter bowling injuries to miss the first Pot Games until his game rounds into shape.
Rama goes on 24 hour 7 day a week duty to keep the equipment held together with rubber bands and baling wire.

 Pudge's Red White & Blue Poster

Chuckster is asking for more hours in the Pro Shop so he can save enough money to pay his first half property tax bill on his new house.
Birdie breaks out his tee shirt collection and blue jeans to be ready for opening day.
Skrocki adjusts his work schedule so he can play golf during the day and work nights.
Chimney puts away his brushes and vacuums and cleans up his trusty putter.
Gretchen and Ginger put away their winter clothes in favor of shorts and bikinis much to the pleasure of Billy D and Pudge.
House waits in the parking lot to see if Commish will allow him to play in the Pot Game.
Bear makes his annual pilgrimage to The Masters to haul back hats, shirts and other gear for fellow Pot Gamers.