A Look Into The Future

The Gazette's crystal ball predicts the following will happen in 2013, unless the Mayan's were correct and the world will end on the 21st.

Commish will pack his clubs away and becomes a full time farmer (animal care giver) when Mrs Commish brings in an abused elephant, six donkeys, two zebras and twenty miniature goats to her already overcrowded animal shelter.

Cheez will sell his house and play the Pot Game for the last time in August. He will demand his hole-in-one pool money back because he won't have an opportunity to make one. He will be denied.

Birdie with the economy sliding into recession again renounces his Democratic Liberal ways and makes Fox News his station of choice every night.

TJ attended the Pelz Short Game school to sharpen his game since he already hits it over 300 with a fade with new extra stiff shafted driver.

Murt makes a comeback with new hip. His game is sharp as ever along with his deck wit. Back on the Pro Am circuit with Pudge.

Brad-Brian decked out in Chicago Bear's colors gets a Saturday pass from his wife to play in the Pot Games. After having one too many on the deck in June, wife revokes pass for a month.

Deacon starts organizing Invitational in March. Floats out 22 different dates to see who can play, picks one but then changes back and forth three times. Ends up with a foursome of Blue Tees (who had some new ideas on format), Skooger (heard there was free popcorn) and Mini (Daddy didn't have any news jobs lined up for him that weekend). Tournament was canceled.

Tractorman had stomach problems. Turns out the 12 bowls of Chili he ate at Deacon's Christmas Party burned a hole in his stomach lining. Had to go on an all yogurt diet for three months. While on the diet, he started salivating every time a Pot Gamer ate a hamburger on the deck.

Mad Dog started driving again. He found that by cocking his head to the right at an angle of four degrees,  he could see most of the road. He only hit 6 mailboxes through the end of June and only 4 after that before they took away his license.

Chuckie doesn't work in the Pro Shop. His days are filled with supervising the bartenders in the Men's lounge. If he is bragging about 36s and 40s he is not talking golf scores.

Sr Pro returned as a regular. F bombs filled the air from tee to green just like old times. Suzy made a few appearances on the deck as well.

Cabot resumed his Week Day Commissioner role when he got back in May. He wore spikeless shoes so when he walks in Pot Gamers lines he doesn't leave any marks. His house never sold so he will be back next year unlike the Cheez.

Danny Roy tried to play once in April but his cellphone ran out of power on the back nine so his girlfriend could not reach him every five minutes so he wasn't allowed to come back. His Jungle Juice was greatly missed.

Jay Esh received notice from the USGA that his putter no longer qualifies for play because of the plugger on the bottom for picking his ball out of cup. He was told it was too much of an unfair advantage. He suspects John Holler turned him into the USGA.

Fireman misses several Mid Week Pot Games after he spent the night in his plush Captain's quarters at the new Keene Firehouse. The Gazette's under cover reporter found out his sleeping late was caused by the nightly massages he receives from the female interns and plunges in the hot tub shaped like a fire truck which relaxed him into a noodle state.

Billy D takes a terrible tumble on the ski slopes and wrenches his back in the opposite direction of his golf swing.  Which resulted in his back feeling like a million bucks leading to his lowest index (1.2) ever by July.  Plays as a Captain for the rest of the summer.

Dougie quits teaching and starts a new company which organizes "road trip" tournaments for members of private clubs at all the best courses in New England.  Meets with huge success until he hires Deacon to drive a van to transport players and he (Deacon) gets lost and 8 players missed their tee time.  By September Dougie is back teaching.

Triple N recovers from achilles tear but his golf game doesn't.  Rumor has it that he depressed over not getting his desired nickname of Zoom Zoom.  He walks too slow with limp so nickname is inappropriate.

House never returned to Pot Game because he was collecting too many quarters from the B Group.  He did try to get into the Chili Party but was turned away at the door by Deacon when he didn't know the secret Pot Gamer handshake.  Public Service never hired him back for emergency line work because they said he was too twitchy with his wrench and pole.

Little Bow Pete now banished from Illinois and Iowa for illegal hunting techniques (crossbow) decides to give up hunting altogether.   He decided to write a book titled "Winning By Not Giving Anything".  It was not a success.  Only a few copies were sold.  it was dedicated to someone named George.

Chimney's "rama jama" putting technique was caught on film when he played a Charity event at Foxwoods sponsored by Dick's Sporting Goods in June.   Dick's hired him to give putting demos throughout the Northeast at their stores.  So no more rooftops for him.

Sandy's scores climb when he plays in windy conditions because of his high trajectory.  He quietly sought out Commish to learn the art of the "stinger" shot.  So now there are four players who can hit it Commish, Birdie, Sandy and TW.

Pudge celebrated giving his 10,000th lesson in May.  The bad part of that was the "Big House" sent him a bill for range use after they read the article in the Sentinel.  Memorial Day marked his largest number of Pot Gamers at a Red, White and Blue Tournament 30 only to be topped by 4th of July's 32.

Otis got his T-Bird work schedule down to 3 hours a day (6-9am).  So with 5 hours a day free before he has to go home to check his honey-do-list, he increased his already plentiful scramble tournament schedule.  But in August his picture appeared in the Sentinel as winner of Clark Distributors Bud Light Scramble, thus ended his appearance in weekend Pot Games.  His wife subscribes to The Sentinel. 

Hagen and his wife tired of the Temple Band formed their own "Umpa Band".  They play at German restaurants all across New England. The Gazette has yet to get a picture of Hagen in his lederhosen.

Skrocki after wearing out the faces of his 25 year old irons finally breaks down and gets a new set.  Well new to him,  as he cut a deal with Billy D to get his irons that he would normally turn into Pudge at Dick's.  So looks like Skrocki will be playing with two new sets a summer.

Rama has had the John Daley backswing and the Doug Sanders backswing, but in February he asked Deacon to teach him the "Smooth Swing With Posing", that AD has perfected.  It worked so well that instead of Deacon winning all the Pots they flowed into Rama pockets.  With the better swing came better scores so the "Sons of Beeches" and "Swahili  Cockboxer" which filled the air were no more.  They were missed.

Forty after having to keep filling up his "40 Mobile" even though he wasn't using it, decided to lock it in his garage to keep it away from his neighbor.  His wife found him a third job doing landscaping after he gets done reading meters and checking houses.  So if Pot Gamers need a landscaper they just head to Mad Dog's neighborhood and they now have two choices.

Mini after finding out his neighbor started a landscaping business in June, decided to attend beauty school to get licensed as a hairdresser.   He talked Mrs Mad Dog into being his first customer after he got his license in July.  She was mysteriously house bound for several weeks in July and then wore a hat when she was in public.  The State took his license away in August and was forced to move out of Daddy's compound the same month.

Skooger opened a new business in March.  He bought a used lunch truck and retrofitted it with two huge popcorn popper machines.  He calls it "Artie's Flying Kernels".  By September he was out of business and thirty pounds heavier from eating too much of his own creations.

Blue Tees realizing his blood pressure was dangerously elevated when he played in Pot Games, enrolled in January in an online course called "Meditate Your Way To Lower Scores".  It was working for the first few months, but then he decided to elevate his technique which required him to chant when he was under extreme pressure.  In July he was back to being red faced  and frustrated in other words normal.

Scotty-Steve joined Brattleboro instead of Bretwood.  He invites three Pot Gamers over every month to play matches.  He usually wins because he has his "biker" girlfriend caddy for him dressed in only a bikini.  When the weather turned cool in September his winning ways did take a dip.

Joey M founded an organization called YAGFONH (Yankee And Giant Fans Of NH).  Between keeping up with the Facebook and Twitter feeds for his organization he hardly has time for playing in the Pot Game.  Deacon was a charter member.  He does however make time for his own tournament called OFITR (One Foot In The Rough) played in September.