The Gazette has been researching the winter activities of Pot Gamers to be able to rate their golf readiness when opening day (according to Mad Dog) hits in only 36 days. We have placed them in different categories.
Locked & Loaded
Brad-Brian after months of pounding balls in his new indoor practice range with his boys he is primed and ready to go. He should be a top pick for any Captain.
Jay Esch has been enjoying the warm Florida weather while he rounds his game into shape. His swing will be well grooved although his putting still runs hot and cold.
Chuckster had
Dickie Mac install an indoor putting green in his new range. After 22 putters and 4 grip changes he has found his stroke. One of the best drivers of the ball already and now armed with new stroke look for him to lead his team with birdies.
Bayou Bomber is always in top form because he is a golfer who is a sportswriter in his spare time. He hates cold weather so no doubt he has been lobbing Sentinel to have him do Spring Training stories so he can tune up his game.
Billy D by skiing all winter is in great shape for golf. His muscles are relaxed and loose from Gretchen's nightly massages. You won't get a low 70s score out of him but you get a guaranteed 78 to 82 every time.
Jerry Mag has been very quiet this winter. No one knows what he is up too. However we have learned he has booked a spring golf trip to SC so his game should be in top shape. The only question after his trip will be, will the rounds of golf, rounds of beer and rounds to the strip clubs deplete all his pot game funds.
Worth A Look
Triple N has been concentrating on trying to sell real estate instead of his golf game. On his bad day his score is still among the lowest of any Captain. Only hesitation would be his putting was a little shaky last season and he does seem emotionally affected by being one of the few Pot Gamers not given a proper nickname.
Fireman with his new pole climbing Popeye forearms rumor has it he has gained 20 yards on his driver, 15 yards forward and 5 yards right. Never gives up and spins some good tales during the round.
Chimney now that he has his trusted putter back in his bag, he is always a threat to make some big putts for his team. Plus by ramming his putts in, he crushes the rim making the hole bigger for his teammates.
Otis because he has a short back swing was able to practice all winter in his office which is the size of a telephone booth at the T-Bird . With the old Commish coming back into power he will let Otis play as a B man based on his manipulated handicap instead of playing out of the Captain slot as Bear made him do. So he has a license to steal a few pots for his teammates.
Dr Dave didn't go south or hit in an indoor range but it doesn't matter, money finds him. Last summer whether he shot 85 or 79 his team always cashed. The only caution would be if he hurt his wrist this winter drilling and filling patients working his busy 2.5 days a week.
TJ hasn't let anybody know if he has been sneaking away to play golf somewhere but we doubt it given he has fatherhood duties now. Rumor has it he has been running to get in shape so he can keep up with his daughter when she learns to walk. He was starting to get that length isn't everything last summer so look for him to start posting some consistent scores in the 70s.
Sandy hits it long and straight all year long with or without practice. The slow bumpy greens will help him when everyone else won't be able to roll the ball into the cup either. A solid pick for early season conditions where high ball hitters are rewarded when fairways are soft and muddy.
Dougie teaches all winter. Doesn't do anything foolish like winter camping or hiking up frozen mountain peaks but he also doesn't practice his golf swing. Somehow though when the season opens he is hitting it straight down the fairway. Very steady, great laugh and does get motivated if you buy him a fruity drink on the deck.
Rama bankrolled his winter dinners out with his wife thanks to his wins over House last summer. Since he adapted his short swing he has become a consistent contributor to his teams. There must be something in those Heinekens he drinks on the deck. Look for more smiles from Rama and tears from House this summer.
On The Fence
Tractorman coming off a late fall shoulder injury the jury is still out on whether he will return to form of early 2013 when 75s were his average scores. Working on the Bretwood underground course heating system may have kept the shoulder strengthened enough to get off to a quick start.
Joey M in his second year with his bionic knee should hold up physically but the emotional toll of his constant playing partner Blue Tees not coming back this year is a real unknown factor as how it will affect his performance. Safe bet his good days will 74s but his bad days may creep up to mid 80s.
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| Ginger |
Pudge is a wildcard given his recent romance with Ginger. He hasn't lifted a club other than to give her lots of private lessons. Normally a solid Captain with nothing but golf on his mind both at work and play but now he has entered the Ginger zone, even Murt's not sure what to expect. Hopefully he will bring her out to caddy for him in the Pot Game.
Dickie Mac swooped in last summer after his son challenged him to play. It was like he had never left for five years, solid rounds in high 70s low 80s, plenty of bitching of unfair teams, laying down on the green to see the line of the putt and enjoying a few cold ones on the deck. Expect more of the same this summer.
House in the early part of the winter was traveling to CT to keep his game sharp. But with his travels to Maine, Georgia, South Carolina to help fix electric lines from ice damage may have taken its toll on him mentally and physically. With lots of overtime pay in his pocket his poker addiction has resurfaced so golf has taken a backseat. We would have to rate him risky at best but then again when hasn't he been.
Mad Dog had more retirements and comebacks than any other Pot Gamer last summer and fall. He also holds the record for most games missed because of ailments (bad back, headache (or was that his wife), pinched nerve, double vision, no vision, partial vision, too tired, sore arm from painting, grandfather syndrome, too cold, too hot or case of the chunks ). So you never know day to day who or what you are getting.
Birdie has been busy this winter. He has made three trips to Colorado since Jan. He flies out spends only one day then rents a large van and drives back to NH. At first we thought he was really into skiing out west but then we found out he doesn't ski. So not sure what he is up to. It seems like some kind of smoke screen.
Skrocki had a up and down 2013 mostly because of the dreaded shank making an occasional appearance. He has been working hard on his chipping by making a channel to chip through at work. He only wrecked two cases on cabbages and 12 watermelons before he found his grove again. It remains to be seen however whether he can perform without vegetables.
Lots Of Baggage
Cheez even though he plays every day in The
Villages all winter he can't find consistency. A three day stint in the mid 70s turns into a week long struggle in the mid 80s. When he plays this spring he will be paying weekend rates for green fees which means he will be worried about how much money it is costing him instead of how he is hitting it. He will be a downer for any team.
Commish besides having to scrape all the rust off his game from two years of inactivity has been physiologically damaged by losing to Birdie the last three times in a row. Add on the pressure to try to win enough Pot money to feed dozens of hungry farm animals and you have a player with loads of stress. Never mind that in the early season his multiple layer outfits restrict his already short swing. Easy to see why he is in this category.
Molasses Boy has been traveling back and forth out west to oversee his new hunting business. Golf has been downgraded in his priorities. So between the new rules against slow play and his lack of interest don't look for Molasses Boy to have a break out season. Plus Deacon after getting dumped by him in Twilight, created a voodoo doll that looks just like Molasses Boy and he sticks pins in it nightly.
Deacon rested a large portion of 2013. His head will be ready play out of the gate but will his body? He wants to rework his beautiful tempo golf swing in order to hit high draws. It will take some time to get use to wearing slippers with spikes on the bottom plus his hook spin release from bowling may cause problems with his golf release. He may still be a good pick because he will have a cart to give rides when you get tired (except Cheez).
Skooger after a so so season last year decided to dedicate himself to improving his overall approach to the game of golf. He skied to stay in shape up until he got stuck on a chair lift for three hours in bone chilling cold. So he gave that up. Next he read that his favorite food popcorn actually was healthy for you. So he bought an extra large commercial grade popper. The first time he used it without reading the directions he filled up his kitchen with popcorn when he added 12 cups of corn instead of 1.2 cups. When we asked his wife what Skooger 's reaction was to these accidents, she told us all he said was "Oh Well". So expect the same old Skooger on the golf course. this spring.
Bear hasn't been practicing, hasn't been exercising, but has been eating. He went off the healthy eating for the holidays and never went back to it. So until he can see the ball instead of his belly when he putts I would ask to be switched to another team. There are probably more 87s in his future than 67s.
