My Biography Would Be Entitled

Jay Esh: "Which Way Does It Break?"
Otis: "My Life As A Sandbagger"
Cheez: "The Thrill Was Mine And Now It's Gone"
Commish: "From Counting Beers To Counting Sheep"
Blue Tees: "Lonely On The Whites"
Sandy: "High Balls For A Lifetime"
Birdie: "Life As A Liberal Among Right Wing Zealots"
Mad Dog: "How I Went From Being A Doberman To A Chihuahua" 
Rizzo: "Porn King Of Keene"
Lenny: "My Bad Back Made Me A Slut"
Murt: "If I Am Eating I Have Stopped Drinking"
Sully: "How I Made My First Million In Body Parts"
Pudge: "Life Behind The Counter And On The Range"
Tee J: "By The Book, No Exceptions"
Little Bow Pete: "Never Gave One, Never Will"
Forty: "Reading Meters Beats Getting Shot At"
Deacon: "How Richie Allen Ruined My Life And Made Me A Sinner"
Penguin: "Life On The Public Dole"
Mrs Cheez: "My Life As A Golf Widow And Loving Every Minute Of It"
Hilow: "Never Make What You Don't Need"
Tractorman: "Raises Are Over Rated, I Survived Without Them"
Skooger: "They Loved Me For My Popcorn"
Loy: "How I Became A Human ATM"
Chimney: "A Lifetime Of Looking Into Dark Holes"
Triple N: "Fast Walking My Way Through Life"
House: "My Years In Exile"
Billy D: "Fleeced, How My Kids Spent My Pension Before I Could"
Skrocki: "Life Of A Picker, Veggies That Is"
Scotty-Steve: "Hog Riding Beats Making Four Footers"
Dougie: "Teaching Ruined My Golf Game"
Hagen: "My Life Chasing The Temple Band"
Chuckie: "Answering The Phone In The Predawn Darkness, A Behind The Scenes Look At The Bretwood Empire"
Fireman: "If You Like To Drive The Truck Don't Move Up The Ladder"
Joey M: "Yankee Fan In A Sea Of Red"
Bill M: "Life Gets Short Just Like My Drives After 70"
Coach: "Life After The Pot Game Filled With Lobstah"
Mini: "Imitation The Key To My Success"
Sr Pro: "When I Found Suzy Happiness Was Mine"